September 9 2009

Ok. So I can see that I wrote about my father’s will. I am still going back and forth with my sister Tracy about all that. I think she plans to sue or contest. He cheated us out of some money on a partnership we had with him and she wants what was “hers”. Technically, he started the partnership with land he owned and included us in it. He then sold it for a small fortune and wanted to know if we wanted the money in a lump sum or doled out over a period of time. We chose the period of time method because of my sister Kelly. We were thinking we would need the money to care for my mother later in life should she live as long as her mother (94 years) and Kelly would spend it ALL if given it all at once. Obviously we now know we should have chosen the lump sum method. He took the last remainder of all the money to live on because he had no liquid assets at the time. Now we are left with NADA. He took about $330,000 from each of us. And we paid the taxes on it.

Well, related to that, Tracy is angry and wants her money. I have gone in both directions on what to do. I know if I sue, Norma will be angry and that will jeopardize my kids relationship with her. When I found all this out about his will, I was so angry and upset and hurt. I tried talking to Luke about it and got a long, long lecture about how I should be happy and content with what I’ve been given thus far and how great my life is. I finally told him I couldn’t talk to him about it anymore and cried myself to sleep. The next morning, I felt I had to make one last point with him so while he was getting ready to leave for work, I stopped him and told him that I was so upset because he lectured me and not once did he ever acknowledge that I had a right to be hurt or upset or that he understood why I might be hurt or upset. What did he do? He started lecturing me again. At that point, l lost my shit and threw the boo-boo bunny I was holding (a little ice filled bunny for the kids that I was using to try to reduce the swelling in my eyes from crying so much). I threw it and told him to get the fuck out of the house and go to work because I couldn’t look at him anymore. I told him I was tired of being lectured and that he didn’t seem to care or understand that I was HURT and ANGRY and had good reason to be. He left for work and was supposed to be out of town that night…I was so glad because I needed some time to myself to decompress and regroup. Well, he called about 11am and said he decided he would come home that night. So instead of getting some time to myself, I was lectured yet again all night long and cried and cried. I was so ready to walk out on him. I really was. I just wanted to run away…from everything, including my kids. I was not in a good place.