Neighbors


This is merely a random post but this came to mind today as I was driving through my neighborhood.

Many houses down the street from us, there lives a man who frequently does yard work. Not uncommon. This particular man is probably about 50 years old. He obviously works out because his upper body is pretty muscular and big. I would know this because he always does his yard work with NO SHIRT on. Apparently, he shaves his chest, arms, etc. I guess he wants to show off his hard work at the gym as well. And that would be ok except he has a rather large GUT to work out so much! He obviously doesn’t realize how his gut looks; he thinks he’s some fine piece of EC. Whenever you drive by, he always makes extreme eye contact and continues to watch your car all the way down the street. He is now known around our house as Chesty McGutt.

Another neighbor down at the other end of the street is also a big believer in working out. She is at the neighborhood pool every single day during the summer and gets quite tan. She is so thin, lean, muscular and leathery that is is disturbing. She’s got a six pack of abs that any MAN would kill for. I swear, she must eat nothing but broiled chicken breasts and raw veggies. Anyway, I see her at the pool all summer long and at the elementary school almost every time I’m there. And she still refuses to make eye contact with me or be friendly and say hello. We even saw her family in Orange Beach last summer staying at the same condo…then again later at a restaurant. I’ve discovered she’s a doctor’s wife. I guess she thinks that makes her better than the rest of us alcoholic stay at home moms. I’ve named her Boney Maroney.

But what made that come to mind… Boney Maroney’s house is for sale! I guess her husband’s residency must be complete. Now they can move to a more “upper crust” neighborhood away from us riff raff.

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